Rockstar Roasted (on an open Fire)

Posted on 10. Dec, 2014 by in Half-Assed Posts


So, I’ve avoided all sodas and energy drinks in the past few months. It’s been water and beer for me. Well, also, the morning coffee. But, something about this one from Rockstar intrigued me. Perhaps there’s some subliminal advertising on it that I’m unaware of. Or maybe the word “ROASTED” in all CAPS gives me that Winter Christmas feeling. Either way, I was sold, and picked up a can.


There’s so much going on here: Gluten Free, Lactose Free, Dairy Free. I wouldn’t expect any of those things in a normal energy drink anyway. But, this one is supposed to be a creamy white chocolate coffee beverage.


The color however looks more like brown gravy. Or I guess you could say some kind of coffee. Either way, if it didn’t have the silver and red can, I’d doubt anyone would buy this out of a clear bottle. It just doesn’t look appetizing.


So, with all the “health benefits” this can packs 240 calories. Actually a little lower than the normal Rockstar Drinks. It also packs 225 MG of caffeine in a can. This is why kids should not drink this stuff. But, for some reason, I see it happen all the time. I guess the energy drink has really gotten a niche with the gamer / video game kids.


Anyway, let’s talk about taste. This tastes as if you added a little coffee to your sugar. Holy crap, this is sweet! And not in a good, Candy Land hanging out with the Princess Lolly. I’m talking about going into a Diabetic Shock. I guess I should never trust a drink that has Microcrystalline Cellulose, Pyridoxine Hyrochloride, and Milk Thistle Extract.

Yeah, anyway. I only had about 1/6th of the can and I feel like my heart is beating 6 times faster than is was before. Personally, I won’t be drinking this stuff again. But, if you want to have energy to run from St. Louis to Dallas in 3 hours, this is the drink for you!


One Response to “Rockstar Roasted (on an open Fire)”

  1. josh

    13. Dec, 2014

    Sounds awful, but really good review.

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